Concepts
The irreducible epistemic atoms underlying the curriculum. 4,828 atoms across 8 types
Separate sensing another's emotional state from absorbing…
Separate sensing another's emotional state from absorbing it as your own to maintain empathic concern while avoiding empathic distress.
Calculate the true cost of activities by including attention
Calculate the true cost of activities by including attention residue and transition overhead, not just the activity's nominal duration.
Practice strategic ignorance by deliberately choosing what…
Practice strategic ignorance by deliberately choosing what not to know when information cost exceeds informational value.
Design transition buffers between context switches to close…
Design transition buffers between context switches to close open loops and orient to new contexts, preventing attention residue from degrading subsequent task performance.
Enforce boundaries through consistent consequent action…
Enforce boundaries through consistent consequent action rather than punishment to teach others that limits are structural rather than negotiable.
Address boundary violations by changing your own behavioral…
Address boundary violations by changing your own behavioral pattern in the relationship dance rather than demanding the other person change first.
Track cumulative boundary violation costs through…
Track cumulative boundary violation costs through externalized logging to make invisible depletion patterns visible and actionable.
Recognize resentment as accumulated unacknowledged debts…
Recognize resentment as accumulated unacknowledged debts from repeated yes-when-you-mean-no decisions rather than as character weakness.
Treat guilt following boundary-setting as a conditioned…
Treat guilt following boundary-setting as a conditioned emotional response requiring observation rather than obedience, distinguishing between moral feedback about genuine harm and emotional echo of compliance training.
When establishing new boundaries after prolonged compliance…
When establishing new boundaries after prolonged compliance, expect and tolerate an extinction burst of intensified guilt before the emotional response diminishes.
When stating boundaries, eliminate justifications beyond…
When stating boundaries, eliminate justifications beyond the minimal necessary to avoid providing material for negotiation and to avoid signaling that the boundary requires permission.
Employ calm repetition of boundary statements without…
Employ calm repetition of boundary statements without escalation or new arguments when facing persistent pressure, using the broken record technique to remove footholds for escalation.
Maintain boundaries consistently during the initial testing…
Maintain boundaries consistently during the initial testing phase to avoid creating partial reinforcement schedules that dramatically increase resistance to extinction.
Interpret initial boundary testing as system recalibration…
Interpret initial boundary testing as system recalibration rather than personal attack, expecting a predictable three-phase sequence of probe, escalation, and recalibration.
Minimize the number of visible competing objects…
Minimize the number of visible competing objects in your workspace to reduce mutual suppression in visual cortex and preserve neural resources for intended focus targets.
Maintain a recognizable behavioral default…
Maintain a recognizable behavioral default that is occasionally adjusted rather than stated boundaries that are routinely overridden to distinguish genuine flexibility from masked capitulation.
Repair relationship boundaries through a sequence…
Repair relationship boundaries through a sequence of acknowledgment, reassertion, addressing damage, and collaborative maintenance planning rather than through punishment or silent absorption.
Establish clear boundaries as the structural precondition…
Establish clear boundaries as the structural precondition for deep vulnerability and intimacy, because psychological safety requires knowing where the container edges are.
Design self-boundary systems by moving up the enforcement…
Design self-boundary systems by moving up the enforcement hierarchy from intention to implementation intention to environmental modification to social contract to structural impossibility, matching the strength to the commitment's importance and your failure pattern.
Anchor new behaviors to existing automatic behaviors…
Anchor new behaviors to existing automatic behaviors to borrow their cue reliability and behavioral momentum.
Use bounded time horizons for commitments rather…
Use bounded time horizons for commitments rather than open-ended commitments to create psychologically safe experimentation containers.
Track active commitments like a financial budget…
Track active commitments like a financial budget with explicit capacity limits and regular review cycles.
Budget commitments for realistic average capacity rather…
Budget commitments for realistic average capacity rather than peak capacity to account for inevitable variation in life circumstances.
Deliberately release commitments rather than let them slip…
Deliberately release commitments rather than let them slip quietly to close cognitive loops and recover mental resources.